fridays are moody days. on the one hand you're looking forward to two days off school, on the other you're dreading the long day with an absolute killer timetable plus the pile of work waiting for you during the weekend. sigh.

was even more moody today cos during civics mr ong was seeing everybody individually about the chem results... it's rather depressing. he just doesn't understand that it's not because i didn't spend time on chemistry. in fact, i spent so much time on chem that i think tt's one major factor causing my maths results to drop so drastically. but it also doesn't make sense that my chem results could also drop so much when i really studied harder for it than last time. i still can't figure out what happened... everything doesn't make sense. mr ong said it may be the things we learnt between mct and jct that pulled me down, cos the decrease in marks only came after jct. but how could that be possible when we only did aromatic chem, thermochem and electrochem during that period? he's the one who said my organic chem is pulling me up, plus my thermochem is okay (maybe not, just recalled how i carelessly drew an energy cycle when they wanted an energy level diagram) and i think electrochem wasn't that bad too. maybe i'm wrong... i should really review my paper again.

and then mr ong always asks the same question... are you spending too much time on music? oh please. if i were i wouldn't be getting such marks for it. 2 out of 15 for malay music... pathetic. can't believe myself! the first things that came into my mind were "bamboo gamelan" and "tingklik" (coincidence that the only things i remember from bamboo gamelan were those two words)... why did i change my answer and write bronze gamelan instead? argh. what crap. mr ong just refuses to believe that we always only mug mep last minute when all the other subjects' papers are over. seriously, if i were to mug mep before any of the other subjects he doesn't even need to see me anymore... i would have been kicked out or worse, retained. (yes, getting retained is worse! think of doing spa, and classical string quartets! eurgh. thank you very much, but i'd rather study somewhere else.) even when it comes to practising time, that's really been cut down alot. what used to be like a daily routine of an hour or more of practise is reduced to like... trying to utilise free periods and the time waiting for dinner to practise. definitely not enough!

and somehow mr ong likes to make people flustered during chem prac. he just keeps coming around to the bench to remind you how little time you have left. today he kept hurrying me and i think the pressure makes me even worse than i already am. for one, i wanted to bring the red book to study during lunch... but i forgot. so there's no red book to study. crap. then he keeps emphasising that time is running short and i totally panic. my brain just can't recall what's supposed to be going on in the reaction. i'd really be surprised if i can pass this prac man. luckily it's not spa. thank god i was born earlier than 1987!